If you’re in a bar, or private club as this state calls them, and beer only costs $3 for 32oz of (albeit weak) microbrew, please tip something. Tipping nothing on your $80+ tab does make the rest of us look really good, but I’ve never been that vain.

Really, I don’t care what country you’re from, how much cash you have, how lousy your job pays… if you can afford over $80 worth of beer and booze, you can afford to leave at least a few bucks.

Tip guide on an $80 tab:

  • $0 – Don’t expect to ever get served again. Remember that really big bouncer that checked your ID, he remembers your name, probably where you live.
  • $8-$10 – You’ll get a head shake, a sarcastic thank you and you will be ignored when there are other paying customers around.
  • $10-$16 – Good. You will be forgotten, but not thought poorly of. Remember, those beers were half price, so your tab should really be more like $100. You’re tipping about 10-15%.
  • $16-$20+ – When he said “Thank you.” he meant it. Don’t be surprised if you get passed drinks over waiting customers (the ones that tipped $10) if you come back tomorrow.